I know it will be a good idea to share life lessons learned in my years of successful living.
I am at an interesting point in my life, growing stronger and more confident in my choices and pursuits.
It seems like yesterday when I joined the universe, took my first walking step, and now I am here. How time flies.
I compiled the lists, life lessons, looking at my jottings, writings, quotes, and recordings in the past years.
Everything I have learned in every area of existence, most especially my failures, is what I have listed below.
These areas include finance, relationship, health, spirituality, and life.
And of course, as you know, I am still learning and unlearning, so I get better as the clock ticks.
About the life lessons? Here they are:
Lessons Learned on Dressing
“You don’t judge a book by its cover”, is what we were told.
But trust me, people do. Not only them, we also do it.
I will still say, “Your dressing is your first impression.”
Before anybody could come close to you to even say “Hi”, they first must have noticed your dressing.
Now, this is where most of us got it wrong: You don’t have to break the bank to look good. All you need are three things:
- A skillful tailor,
- Cold water starch and
- A good iron.
Sometimes, I buy shirts of N500, and people confuse it to be N5000. I don’t have to tell you the price.
When you see the clothes on me, make your judgment on price.
Here are tips on dressing:
- You must give out any clothes you have not worn in 60 days and those that keep you in doubt of its fitness.
- If you can, stick with white shirts only. If not, stick with shirts of light colors.
- Get a black, navy blue, brown and dark gray chinos trousers. They go with almost any shoe and cloths.
- Thou shall not buy flashy or clothes with too much designs on it. Else, everyone knows you wore the clothes yesterday.
- Your first suits must be black or at least navy blue because no one gets used to it.
- Get a black and/or deep brown shoe since they fit in with any clothes you may put on.
Life Lessons on Money
Everyone talks about investments, but very few knows where to invest.
Save FIRST before spending. The challenge is not making money but maintaining it.
No matter how disciplined you are, it is hard to save. So, I decide to make it automatic with this company.
Here are few guides on money:
- A budget will do you much good than you know.
- You are not what you drive so invest that money in other important assets.
- In all your investing, embrace real estate investment.
- You can’t enjoy the good life on salary alone. Get other means of income to supplement.
- If your good life comes every 30 days, you need a finance rehabilitation.
- If you can make N1000, you can make N100,000. Extend your value.
- No matter the amount you make from Ponzi or MLM schemes, you can’t boast of any lasting assets you use it for. They will vanish.
- Try as much as possible to stay out of any money making investment if you don’t understand and require some deep technical knowledge to operate. Example: Forex, cryptocurrency and more.
Lessons Learned on Work
My first corporate work digital marketing job was with a UK-affiliated institution, and I lasted 21 days in the role.
What could be the problem? Was I sacked? Was the salary small? No! I resigned.
It pained me not about the salary but the team (friends) I was working with. They were the best.
Three days after my resignation, I got another job offer letter via email from a southwest state of N100,000 pay and bonuses.
I declined. And so it continues.
Here is my opinion about work.
- It’s not worth it spending 8 hours on a work if you can complete same work in 4 hours.
- People are at highest in productivity in only 4 hours of work. Anything else is a waste.
- If I can deliver value from home (e.g digital marketing, SEO, web design, content writing), while come stay at the office. Or at least take the hybrid (part time) approach.
- Reduce cost and time spent transporting by choosing to work from home and sending report to the office once a week if need be.
- You increase your chance to excel faster if you choose to work part time or contract basis than full time. This is because you will meet with opportunities (offers, people, chances) you will never have sitting one place.
- If you can, avoid meetings and instead delegates. I have gotten more wisdom from one-on-one conversation than in board rooms.
Lessons Learned in Business
Before you say, I am not good at business. Everyone is an entrepreneur. We buy and sell all day long.
When I mean business, I am not saying you have to start the next Facebook or own the biggest supermarket in the state. Though there is room to get to such a level.
Here are my lessons learned on business.
- Don’t be ashamed of your first business. My first business was selling groundnuts and sugar at the university.
- One profit making business is better than hundred yet to profit business.
- Cash flow is the sole center of your business. Pay attention to this.
- Never start a business because the idea feels good. Nor should you start one because you had an idea while having your morning walk.
- Validate your idea by checking if there is an existing market for it.
- You need little difference to succeed in business. As little as your competitor selling new and you selling old of same products is enough difference to stand out.
- Once again, never run two businesses at the same time. I closed down 23 started businesses and 3 in the idea phase between 2013 and 2021 just to stick with one.
- Your first business is you. Work on yourself first else your business works on you. It will not be funny.
- Whatever you do at workplace, start a consultant side business on it in your name.
- I don’t know about you but I know there has never been a perfect time to start a business than now.
- Choose to become better over blind growth in business. It means, look out ways to serve your existing customers/clients better than working hard to get new customers.
- Most marketing efforts are a waste of time because most focuses on getting new customers. What happens to the existing customers?
- Your best customers are your existing ones. Build a close but business related relationship with them.
- Never date or ask out your customers. Please don’t.
- Celebrate and reward your existing customers to bring new customers for you. It works like wildfire.
- The best customers are from referrals. The one who introduces them has done most of the work so you don’t have to talk too much.
- If you are in a meeting or on call with a client, don’t lose the reason for the meeting else they bring in their personal problems.
- Be quick to listen and slow to talk so you can win the sales as fast as possible.
- Choose consistency over intensity. It is better to post once a day for 7 days than post 7 times a day about your business.
- Be it work or business, arrive 30 minutes before time and please do come with a book to keep yourself busy while waiting.
Life Lessons about Social Trends
I quitted social media for 12 months and didn’t feel something was missing in me. I don’t know how to say this, “But I hate fake lives.”
In the end, we realize who we are is more important than who we appear to be.
Here are my lessons learned about news and social media:
- The greatest abuse of the 21st century is neither of women nor drugs but of social media.
- 9 out of 10 times of your use of social media, you gain nothing.
- Stop claiming you are getting informed reading news. You don’t have to follow news to be informed. If you need an information, search it out on the internet and when you are through, you leave.
- News has nothing to offer you rather to cause your sorrow. It’s not their fault, only bad news sells.
- Whatever information you have no control over is a critical information. News is not worth it.
- Social media is nothing but a platform full of hatred, fake and mixed feelings. You keep counting likes as though your life depends on it.
- If you use social media for business (as most will claim), you don’t have to quit but can help yourself by doing these two things.
1 Use social media only on laptops.
2 Install the News Feed Eradicator chrome extension. It blocks your news feed so you don’t get to see the distractions on the homepage.
Life Lessons on Health
A friend tells you, let’s go out for jogging. You declined. Yet you eat everything your eyes see. I pity you.
I realize everything stops the moment your health stops.
You can only show love to family if you are alive. Also, you can only make more money when you are sound in health. My dear, don’t joke about your health.
Here are my lessons learned about health.
- You are as good as what you eat. Eat to live and not live to eat.
- Everything in the pot does not have to go to the stomach same time.
- Cutting down the quantity of your foods saves you a lot of money.
- Too much eating causes acne on your face.
- There is a difference between getting fit and growing muscles. Get fit first.
- You only need three indoor exercises to stay fit: Push Up (for the upper body), Sit Up (for the middle body) and Squat (for the lower body).
- Sleep 8 hours; don’t deny yourself. Failure to do so, the next day will be a waste as you will feel tired throughout the entire day.
- My phone goes off 9pm and switches on 5am. That tells you about my sleeping time.
Lessons Learned in Relationship
We can live alone but we can’t be alone – Oluboba Ayodeji
Our relationships are very important to our well-being, especially the emotional aspect. Even the tough of the toughest boss needs someone to love and show the love in return.
You can’t go through life all alone, you need people as much as they need you.
Here are my lessons learned from relationship
- Settle any differences with your family members as quick as possible even if it means you accepting the blame. There is no better peace than this.
- Be genuinely interested in others. Look out for their good and do everything to support their dreams with no strings attached.
- Don’t go into a relationship until you settle and are ready to marry in 12 months’ time. I mean it.
- If there is a girl you admire, move close to her and keep her as one of your besties, but not a lover.
- She will expect little from you as best friends compare to you dating her.
- My besties have done more for and with me than they have to their boyfriends.
- A girl will value more the help she receives from you as a friend than as her lover.
- We will spend most part of our life in marriage, so why the rush.
- Explore the world and enjoy the freedom that comes with being single.
- If you can, avoid long distance relationship. If you don’t, be ready to face the countless headaches and mixed feelings that come with it. I knew about my first two relationships.
- People love who they see and can touch. Your chats, phone and video calls won’t do much. Still on long distance relationship.
- Until a lady settles her internal (family, health, financial) problems, don’t aim to be the hero. Assist and support but don’t be the hero else you fall victim to the pity kind of love.
- In hundred over hundred times, value someone’s physical presence with you than the virtual ones. No wonder I don’t pick calls when discussing with someone except its call from my parent.
- For decision making in relationship, think with your brain (logic) and not your heart (emotion). Emotions have destroyed a lot.
- It is better for your partner to hate you today for what is right than they love you tomorrow for what is wrong. Which means, you don’t have to say “Yes” to all requests, especially if you see no wonderful future in it.
- Why waste a lady’s time if you won’t marry her? Let her go so those who know her worth can do the necessary.
- For most female friends I meet, I let them know I don’t have the intention to marry them so they don’t put their hope on me.
- You don’t have to date every lady you know. Most are best kept as friends.
- You can only satisfy a man with four things: Respect, Food, Sex and Neatness. Read that again.
- Your woman can be the answer to your prayers. Honour her.
A lady you don’t celebrate will not appreciate. Thus, compliment her beauty but much more her character. – Oluboba Ayodeji
Lessons Learned on Spirituality
- Love God
- Extend His love to his creations (humans)
- Love Yourself
- Be wise because we end up becoming victim of those things we preach against the most.
- Don’t condemn those who sins. Remember, you are also one of them, only that you sin differently.
- Be flexible in your interaction with men without comprising your faith.
- Even though He (God) knows about your challenges, still ask for his help.
- Understand your words cannot change those of other faith, but your love can.
- The presence and love of God upon you makes you the envy of all. Please ask in prayers.
In days of challenges, move closer to God. In the days of victory, move closest to God – Oluboba Ayodeji